Postpartum anxiety

1 in 7 new Mums will develop postpartum depression after giving birth and this is often spoken about post labour, however its sister disorder postpartum anxiety is something I had never heard of. That is until I was diagnosed with it at Ivy’s 6 week check up by my Health Visitor. Anxiety and the baby blues are part and parcel of being a new Mum, but postpartum anxiety is when these thoughts are taken to the extreme and become slightly obsessive.

Near enough every night since having Ivy I have had nightmares about people breaking into our house to come and harm her. Axes. Guns. Knives. In every nightmare there is nothing I can do to protect her, and trust me I have tried everything. I wake up sweating from pure fear. It’s exhausting, both emotionally and physically.

Every time Ivy has a cough I convince myself that she’s choking or developing something that requires a hospital trip. Apparently this form of postnatal anxiety is called postnatal OCD, where you constantly fear the worst happening to your baby for no real reason.

Luckily I can rationalise my thought process so I don’t call the GP or 999 in a sheer panic, but I know there will be some Mums out there who can’t do that, and they have my sympathy. Mental health still has a stigma around it which makes it taboo to open up about how you feel and the concerns that you have. I believe that these topics should be spoken about more openly, there’s nothing to be ashamed of, and quite often there are many other people having the same thoughts who can offer reassurance. 

Jess x